Sometimes when I sit down to write about my experiences, I find myself at a loss where to start. The writing doesn’t always flow easily from my fingers through the keyboard, and with an ADD Dom by my side to distract me, it can even be harder.
We had sex yesterday afternoon, but it didn’t go well. Suffice it to say I felt like I needed intimacy and closeness, and MasterDoc thought a beating and objectification were in order. It wasn’t. It wasn’t anything traumatic, even with my collar on I’d have spoken up if trauma was going to happen. I know he would want to know such things. But I started off cranky and just became more annoyed as he beat me, and then fucked me. I didn’t get turned on. I didn’t come. Now in his defense, treating me rough and as a fucktoy can get me really worked up oftentimes. It just so happens that this particular afternoon it did the opposite. I went off to take a nap after, and griped about the experience to him before I went to sleep (after my collar was off). Once we both got up from our naps we talked, and thankfully I realize that he’s a human being, and therefore not perfect. I don’t expect him to be. So often he does exactly the right thing for me, but it’s to be expected in the real world that now and then he’ll misjudge what’s needed. I’m proud of myself that acted appropriately as a sub and didn’t mouth off during it, but I waited til after when my collar was off and we could talk about it.
I feel like our relationship is getting better all the time. I’m learning not to overreact to things. We discuss things much more calmly than before. (He’s always been a proponent of calm.) I’m learning not to expect perfection from him. I’m sure I’ve said before that I don’t expect him to be perfect, but I think on some level a submissive wants his/her Dom to be like a god – perfect, always worthy of awe. But while we have those moments and they’re beautiful, in real life people are not perfect. I know that a worthwhile Dom is one who takes the time to learn from their mistakes. A worthwhile Dom is one that can admit that he/she fucked up. And a worthwhile submissive works with his/her Dom to make things better, and still respects the Dom even when they’ve made a mistake and admit it.
Later, we were supposed to go out to the swing club (me, MasterDoc and DeeDee), but when MasterDoc called the owner up it turns out it’s closed currently for construction. Phooey. We had all been looking forward to going out.
We decided to make our own fun at home, even though it meant we didn’t have the audience we’d have at a club. DeeDee, ever creative, started role playing being a stranger who has come to play with a new couple (MasterDoc and I). We didn’t keep up with it for long, but it was fun and inventive to role play.
MasterDoc had DeeDee keep the camera handy. Lately he’s into getting photos of my face during orgasm. I really wish I could share them here. It’s so interesting for me to see as I don’t normally see myself during orgasm. We joked around a bit, as we were all in a pretty silly mood. Then we started to focus and get down to business. MasterDoc quickly put me in my happy place (aka subspace) by stroking my face and my body. It’s wonderful how with just a little focus he can put me there so easily now.
He had to interrupt the proceedings to use the bathroom, and alas he decided to piss on DeeDee. I could hear them in the bathroom next door as he made her come while he pissed on her. I played with some of my Lelo toys (the Gigi til the power ran out and the Nea after). MasterDoc came back in to me after, and he realized that he couldn’t just start up with me again. After such an intense scene, DeeDee needed aftercare. He thought it would be cute if we each cuddled her from either side and he got her to come in and lay on the bed between us. It was definitely a good thing and I joked that she was getting the “deluxe aftercare” last night. As horny as I was, I could put that aside for a moment to enjoy cuddling. DeeDee and I don’t really cuddle, but it wouldn’t be a bad thing to do at all.
She was going to rest on the floor after she felt better – she didn’t want to keep us from fooling around, but she didn’t want to be alone either. I could totally understand that and was fine with her staying there. She didn’t get to rest much, however, before MasterDoc got her taking photos.
To be continued….













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